Am I happy to finally officially graduate from SP?
Maybe.
Am I looking forward to the ceremony?
Was.
Am I going out to celebrate after the ceremony?
No.
Am I excited for the ceremony?
Was & NO!

I am one sad pathetic lonely soul to receive the scroll tomorrow...
No classmates to hurrah with,
no buddies to grab hold of & jump around in our robe with our certs and scroll in our hands,
no celebration to look forward to after the ceremony,
no lecturers that I can't wait to meet and catch up with after the ceremony,
basically nothing to look forward to.
All I have are the robe and a set of graduation get-up that cost me over 100 bux,
plus a super annoying mum who is being fucking petty over what to wear and a pissed off dad.

If this is the case,
I DON'T WANT to go for the ceremony!

It will be a fucking waste of my time,
my energy,
& also my mood.
I rather go to work and slog myself with the accounts all by myself...

It's no big deal right if I don't attend?
Mum is probably going to continue feeling giddy tomorrow and we all may just end up not attending the ceremony at all!
Nobody going to miss me,
nobody going to ask around for me...
They wouldn't even bother about me!
They would just think that
"Ouh iLa didn't make it is it?She's repeating?Aiya expected larz..."

I don't want to attend!
I don't want to make a fool of myself!
I don't want to break down during the ceremony!
I don't want...
I don't want...........

I've been looking forward to the ceremony since the last day of exams...
Now,
it's all gone....

Why am I being punish this way?